


For Him.

by GameCake



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Awesome Laura Hale, But only a little, Derek has a voice of an angel, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Future Fic, Kinda, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Oblivious Derek, Oblivious Stiles, Sad!Derek, Singing, Slow Build, Stiles likes metal and rock too much, Texting, YouTuber Derek, Youtuber Stiles, i guess, much fluff, they are just older, title inspired by a Troye Sivan song, youtube au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-27
Updated: 2016-10-27
Packaged: 2018-08-27 08:40:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8394925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GameCake/pseuds/GameCake
Summary: Derek walked into the kitchen only to catch Laura smiling at his computer while typing. “What are you doing?”Laura startled so hard she jumped. “Nothing! Just… you know, my laptop broke and I used yours.”Derek narrowed his eyes at her. “It looks fine to me.” he claimed and pointed to Laura’s laptop on the counter next to her. “What were you doing?”Laura sighed. “I was emailing a… friend.”“You hesitated.” Derek pointed out and crossed his arms.Laura looked sheepish. “Well… he is not exactly a friend… yet.”“Laura!” “Fine, I emailed Stiles Stilinski and asked him for a collaboration!”Derek’s eyes widened as his heart started running a mile. “You what?” **The YouTube AU where Stiles and Derek collaborate and end up with a bunch of fans that ship them.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I am not sure how this happened and why, but i like it.
> 
> I am my own beta, again, sorry. (Technically, I _am_ qualified for it, since i have passed my ECPE Michigan examination 3 years ago, but, oh well, I haven't had an English class since then)
> 
>  
> 
> [Playlist of songs used (and mentioned)](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2LnPMqkBYhuBClLikJZa1ZCBRjgLR0or)
> 
>  
> 
> Hope you enjoy :)

Derek hadn’t planned on being that popular.

 

He had first uploaded a video of himself covering the song ‘Hurt’ by Christina Aguilera in an acapella version, because Laura insisted he should.

 

He knew he had quite a voice, his parents had noticed too, which was why he had started practicing the piano and violin since he was seven. But Derek never really did anything with it.

 

Laura had claimed that singing would help him cope with the loss of his parents and their little sister, Cora. She had said that she read it online somewhere and that he needed to at least try.

 

And he did. He uploaded his first video and immediately had felt better just by hitting ‘upload’ -the number of likes it gathered helped too. So he kept uploading videos.

 

When Laura and Peter, their uncle, noticed the difference in his behavior, they encouraged him to keep going. On his next birthday, Laura bought him a better camera and Peter provided with a better microphone.

 

After that, his subscriber count kept growing and his videos became highly popular.

 

He had collaborated with several other YouTubers over the past 3 years and he could say he was happy.

 

But his covers kept diverting from melancholic ballads, to sad songs, something that worried Laura.

 

A worried Laura was hard to miss. Derek just knew she was worrying by the forced smile on her face and the void encouraging words, whenever he shared an idea about a new video.

 

Laura wasn’t the best liar, she would always try to do anything to make Derek not notice her when she is up to something, which is exactly what always gave her away.

 

This was why when he was finished with covering Sia’s ‘Elastic Heart’, he purposely walked into the kitchen as subtly as he could to catch Laura smiling at his computer while typing.

 

He moved behind her as softly as he could and peeked over her shoulder. He found that Laura was reading an email. “What are you doing?”

 

Laura startled so hard she jumped and knocked her head on his chin. She quickly recovered, though, and she scrabbled to cover the screen with her hands so Derek couldn’t read anything. “Nothing! Just… you know, my laptop broke and I used yours.”

 

Derek narrowed his eyes at her. “Your laptop died?”

 

Laura nodded. “Yes.”

 

“It looks fine to me.” Derek claimed and pointed to Laura’s laptop which was on the counter next to her. “What were you doing?”

 

Laura sighed. “I was emailing a… friend.”

 

“You hesitated.” Derek pointed out and crossed his arms.

 

Laura looked sheepish. “Well… he is not exactly a friend… yet.”

 

“Laura!”

 

“Fine, I emailed Stiles Stilinski and asked him for a collaboration!”

 

Derek’s eyes widened as his heart started running a mile. “You _what_?”

 

“Look, I am worried and this Stiles is coming to New York in a week, and I thought that maybe it would cheer you up. You are always happier after a collab.” Laura replied defiantly.

 

“Why didn’t you ask me first? Do you even know what kind of music he plays?” Derek whined.

 

“Of course I know. You can’t back off now, he already accepted.” Laura said smugly.

 

“Oh my god, Laura!” Derek yelled frustrated.

 

“You better deal with it. He will be here on Wednesday, now edit your damn video and go to sleep.” She commanded in her older sister voice that was an imitation of the tone their mother used to use to get them to do something.

 

Laura exited the room and Derek was left alone looking at the email Stiles had sent.

 

This wasn’t going to work.

 

Derek couldn’t collaborate with Stiles Stilinski, they didn’t match at all!

 

Derek sang songs about break-ups, grief, and pain, with his piano and violin, while Stiles was more of a rock singer. He used an electric guitar and drums.

 

_Stiles even does the scream thing if the song calls for it!_

 

This was not just bad. This was a disaster!

 

Derek rubbed his forehead as he started feeling a migraine settling there. He sighed and did the only thing that he truly excelled at. He made his video.

 

 

**

 

Stiles was with Scott when he received an email in his private account. He frowned and stopped mid-sentence to check it and then promptly flailed and fell off his chair.

 

“Dude!” was all he could manage, utter shock shown on his face as he turned his eyes from his mobile screen to his best-friend.

 

“What? What happened?” Scott inquired looking worried.

 

“Oh my god! You won’t believe who sent me an email!” At Scott’s pointed look he went on. “Derek fucking Hale, oh shit, man, _Derek Hale asked me to collaborate with him_!”

Scott’s eyes widened comically. “What?” his voice held a tone that Stiles was familiar with.

 

“You have no idea who he is, do you?” Stiles asked.

 

“Uh… is he… from that band you like? Like… Halestorm?”

 

Stiles face-palmed. “ _No!_ Even though it rhymes, and I see what you did there, he is not in a band! He is a fellow YouTuber! You know… the one that looks like a god? The one with the angelic voice?”

 

Scott’s face cleared of all confusion. “Oh! Right! The guy you had a crush on, even after he sang that One Direction song.”

 

Stiles’s cheeks reddened. “I don’t have a crush on him!”

 

Scott just raised an eyebrow.

 

“I don’t.” Stiles claimed and Scott pulled a face that Stiles knew that meant ‘sure you don’t’. “Okay fine, I like him. But that is beside the point! The point is… this guy is the one who sounds like heaven! Remember his performance on _Truce_ by Twenty One Pilots? Man, I swear I shed some very manly tears on that one. And he wants to collab with me! _Me! Stiles._ ”

 

“That’s great, dude.” Scott said and slapped his shoulder gently.

 

“Oh my god, if I reply now do I look over-eager?” Stiles worried biting his bottom lip.

 

“This isn’t texting for dates, Stiles, just let the man know you are available!”

 

Stiles smirked. “Oh, I so want to show him I am _available._ ”

 

Scott made a gagging sound. “Dude, stop, no, just no.”

 

“Oh shit! Scott, what should I wear?” Stiles exclaimed.

 

Scott shrugged. “It’s not like you have many options; you only wear black jeans, leather and an occasional plaid shirt.”

 

“Yeah, you are right.”

 

**

 

Stiles, being the impatient, over dramatic, hyperactive, research freak he is, spent the days leading to his trip to New York watching every video that had Derek’s face in it and read every article that even mentioned his name.

 

If he was a little sleep deprived even before he got on the plane, then it is no-one’s business.

 

He was just overexcited. He truly admired Derek for a long time, probably only a couple of months after he uploaded his first video.

 

And what a video. It didn’t look like much, it was just a handsome, barely adult, man who was sitting next to his piano and shyly talking to the camera. But then he started singing. His voice was melodic and was completely complimented by the soft tones he was pressing on the keys under his fingers.

 

And then he reached the highlight of the song where he _nailed_ that high tone.

 

Before that video, Stiles was unsure that a male could reach that high-note and be as amazing as Derek sounded.

 

But, apparently, Derek was one of a kind.

 

**

 

It was Wednesday morning and Derek was _not_ freaking out. He absolutely wasn’t. His hands weren’t trembling with anticipation and his heart wasn’t beating that heard.

 

Okay who was he kidding, he was anxious as hell.

 

But why was Derek that affected? He had surely done this before and he never felt quite like that.

 

Stiles wasn’t even as popular as him. He didn’t even seem to have a specified taste in anything. He is able to turn up looking like a high school boy and the next day as a true rockstar. He had tattoos and a stretching piercing and yet he could pull off the goofy look. He manages to be both a nerdy kid and a sophisticated adult. He claims he likes all kinds of music and he insists that he loves pop-nonsense, but when he was asked if he would ever sing a pop ballad, he said that he would only ever sing a song like that for the person he truly loved if it was their desire.

 

He was just… infuriating, loud, sarcastic and incredibly smart-mouthed to the point that he confused Derek.

 

Stiles was supposed to arrive anytime now and Laura had conveniently -and suspiciously, if you ask Derek- had disappeared. Derek took it as a sign that he should be worried.

 

And then the bell rang.  Derek rushed to the door and, unsurprisingly, found Stiles there. He had a red beanie on, even though the weather was not requiring anything but a light jacket. He was wearing a plaid red and black shirt along with a pure black undershirt and black skinny jeans.

 

Up close he looked different from his videos. He was more youthful and… _cute?_

 

Don’t get Derek wrong, Stiles had created quite an image for himself, having a tiny beard on his chin, a stretch piercing on one ear and more tattoos on his forearms that Derek had seen live on anyone. He shouldn’t look _pretty_ or _cute,_ but in Derek’s eyes, apparently, he was _adorable_.

 

“Hey, man! I’m Stiles.” He said and extended his arm for Derek to shake. “You probably knew that already.” He added with a nervous chuckle. “I am here for the video?”

 

“Derek.” Derek said and took Stiles’s hand in his. “Come in.” he said and moved back to allow entrance to Stiles.

 

Stiles picked up his guitar and bag, and walked in. His eyes flickered around the place in order to get in his surroundings. “Dude, your house looks awesome!”

 

“Thanks.” Derek said awkwardly. “Do you want anything to drink?”

“Uh, is coffee an option?”  Stiles asked hesitantly.

 

“Of course, follow me.” Derek offered and let them to the kitchen and pointed the coffee machine on the counter on their right.

 

Stiles widened his eyes at the sight. “Oh my god, this is like… superior technology. And you have all these flavours? You know what? The next thing I am investing on, is a coffee machine like this one!” he stated and started poking the buttons while searching for a flavour that he liked.

 

Derek rolled his eyes at the excitement. “Laura insisted on buying this.”

 

“Laura was right, let me tell you. And Laura is…?” Stiles asked curiously.

 

“My sister. We live together.”

 

“Oh, that’s great. I didn’t know you have a sister. You don’t talk about your family much, do you?” Stiles said absently.

 

Derek wasn’t ready for a conversation like this, in fact, he was never ready for this kind of topic with anyone, much less a stranger who was in his house only for… work. “No, I don’t.” he snapped.

 

Stiles’s attention turned back to him in a flash and Derek felt momentary guilty by the surprised hurt look Stiles’s eyes spotted for a second. “Oh, right. Sorry.” He muttered and withdrew a bit while he waited for his coffee to be brewed.

 

Awkward silence seemed to settle after that. Derek wanted to take them back to the careless banter but he didn’t know what to say.

 

In the end, it was Stiles, who moaned ridiculously –and unnecessarily, Derek didn’t need to hear that- at his first sip of his coffee, that broke the silence. “Oh god, this is amazing. Talk about good stuff.”

 

Derek hummed to show he was paying attention but didn’t say anything otherwise.

 

“Well…” Stiles started after a couple more sips. “As much as I enjoy drinking in silence with you looming over me, don’t you think that maybe we should choose a song or something?”

 

 _Right,_ the song.

 

Derek shrugged. “Do you have any ideas?”

 

“Well… I do, but I am willing to hear you out, whatever you are comfortable, I am okay with.”

 

“How about… _Goner_ by Twenty One Pilots?” Derek offered.

 

Stiles grimaced slightly and hesitated. “It’s a very nice song, but… don’t you think it is a little too depressing?” he asked cautiously.

 

Derek deflated. If he was being honest, he chose the song because it was his type of song while he could also see Stiles singing it. That wasn’t the case apparently, Stiles wanted something _less depressing_. What did that even mean? He had to know that Derek sings songs like that, what did he expect?

 

Derek wasn’t sure which other song to suggest, so he looked around the room for an idea. His eyes fell on Laura’s 007 mug. “Uh… how about ‘ _Writing’s on the Wall’_?”

 

Stile’s left eye twitched at that but his polite smile was still on. “Uh… how about maybe something more energetic?” he suggested gently. “Maybe, _Wreak Havoc_ by Skylar Grey?”

 

It was Derek’s turn to grimace. It was not that he didn’t like the song per se, it was just not his thing.

 

Stiles caught on that immediately. “Uh… _Mz. Hyde_ by Halestorm?” Derek frowned at the suggestion. He knew of the band, but he never really listened to them, so the song was unrecognisable to him. “It’s good! I like it a lot and there is a nice rhyme to the band name with your surname!” Stiles babbled urgently and pulled his phone out to put the song on.

 

Derek had to admit, the music was rhythmical and the intro was catching, but the song altogether was too much. He felt out of his comfort zone with songs like that. “It is a nice song,” He started and Stiles’s face lightened up. “but I would feel better with something less… intense.” He said and Stiles’s face fell,

 

All in all, they spent the following hour debating which song to use but it got nowhere.

 

“You do realise that I sing mostly rock and metal, right?” Stiles asked while rubbing his head.

 

“And you do realise I sing ballads and _depressing stuff_ right?” Derek countered back in frustration.

 

“Seeing you are the one who invited me, I thought you would have thought this through.” Stiles said throwing his arms in exaggeration.

 

“Seeing that I was not, in fact, the one that sent those emails, I didn’t have to think this through!” Derek snapped.

 

Stiles seemed taken aback. His eyes widened and his expression turned to one that Derek couldn’t recognise fast enough before it was gone as Stiles pulled on a flawless poker face. “Right.” He said. “Maybe we should just stick to your first suggestion, for now.”

 

Derek blinked several times. “Twenty one Pilots?”

 

“Yeah, whatever.” Stiles said looking away.

 

Derek was uneasy then. He didn’t understand why Stiles suddenly seemed so far off and he didn’t know how to fix it. “Which song?”

 

Stiles shrugged. “You suggested _Goner_.”

 

“And you said it was too depressing. I want you to like the song we cover too.” Derek tried but Stiles was suddenly uncaring and brushed him off. “Would it be better if we chose another song from the same band? There are faster ones if you want something less sad.”

 

Stiles bit his lip nervously. “Could we do maybe _Stressed Out_ or _Migraine_?”

 

“Sure.” Derek agreed, finally having found something finally to work on.

 

“Stressed Out?” Stiles asked and sighed when Derek agreed. “Good. Let’s get to it.”

 

They spent the next six hours orchestrating the video with –thankfully- minimal arguing.

 

For the music, they decided to make the electric guitar more prominent so it could give off the rock vibe all Stiles’s covers have. Stiles decided that they would add the drums from the instrumental version of the actual song, since they hadn’t thought about that either.

 

They divided the song into 3 parts.

 

At first, it would start energetically and intensely. Stiles would sing until the first chorus, and then it would start slowing down a bit, until the music smoothly went from intense to melancholic.

 

That was when Derek was joining in. He was supposed to sing until the next chorus, which would start slow but then tension would build up until it returned to the version they started with.

 

Stiles voted that they should forego the last verse and Derek agreed.

 

They set up 4 cameras, one was in front of Stiles who was standing with his guitar a few feet away from Derek, the other was on Derek’s piano, the other two to their sides and the last one facing them both to make them fit in the same frame.

 

They recorded the music first, and then they spent the following 5 hours filming. It was exhausting and by the time they nailed every note and were ready to put the video together, Stiles had drunk 3 more cups of coffee and Laura had texted Derek that she would sleep at Isaac’s.

 

“We should finish this tomorrow.” Derek said after Stiles yawned for the 5th time since they started the editing.

 

“No, it’s okay, let’s finish this now.” Stiles said, but his eyes were heavy-lidded with exhaustion and he didn’t convince Derek.

 

“It wasn’t a suggestion.” He stated and Stiles turned at him. “You look like shit. We are stopping.”

 

“But-“

 

“No.” Derek said firmly. “I am going to order pizza, in the meantime, you will be find a movie and we will watch it until we eat.” Derek said and guided Stiles back to the living room and gave him a remote for the TV.

 

When he got back, Stiles had picked what seemed to be a comedy. “I have been meaning to watch this, hope you don’t mind comedies.” He said.

 

Derek sat next to him on the couch. “It’s okay. Which one is it?”

 

“ _Crazy Stupid Love_. I have heard it is really good and I am in the mood for something to relax and laugh.”

 

“Let’s see if it is as good as people make it sound then.” Derek decided and pressed ‘play’.

 

**

 

The movie turned out to be exactly how Stiles described it relaxing and funny. By the end of it, they had somehow lied on the couch in the opposite ends in a way that their legs were tangled a bit uncomfortably, but neither cared enough to change their position.

 

Stiles had a seated smile gracing his face and his posture was relaxed to the point that he was practically dozing.

 

Derek’s stomach fluttered at the sight. He wasn’t ready to analyze why his stomach was upset of why his heart clenched like it did every time Stiles laughed during the movie or when he accidentally touched Derek more than necessary.

 

He didn’t know what it meant, since he hadn’t felt like that since high school, before… _before_.

 

Before his parents and Cora decided to visit Laura and Derek at New York, only to have an accident and never make it there.

 

Even before that, when Paige, his old girlfriend, who realized a little too late that she was _sick_ , died.

 

He knew Laura was worried about that too. He knew she worried about him not dating, not seeing anyone apart from the rare occasions of a party that he was obliged to go where he almost always ends up with a one night stand on nothing at all.

 

Derek’s thoughts were interrupted by Stiles’s ringtone blazing loudly. Stiles jumped at the sudden sound. He cursed and left the room to answer.

 

Derek just stared blankly at the empty space that Stiles occupied a few seconds ago, already missing the warmth on his legs.

 

When Stiles came back, he made a word for leaving and Derek- Derek didn’t want that.

 

It was a strange feeling, the urgency to keep Stiles there a little more, with Laura gone, he didn’t want to be _alone_.

 

So he suggested that Stiles stayed the night. He argued that they could have breakfast and work on the video without any delays. He said it was late and that it was safer to stay with him anyway.

 

Stiles didn’t agree at first, he was dubious and claimed that he had a hotel booked, but then he heard Derek out and complied.

 

So he ended up sleeping in the guest room across from Derek’s.

 

Derek wasn’t sure how Stiles could sleep when he had conceived so much coffee in one day, but that seemed to be another trait Stiles owned.

 

Derek, on the other hand, didn’t feel sleepy at all. His stomach was filled with a sense of urgency that kept him awake and inspired. He decided he should do something productive at least, instead of looking at the blank ceiling, so he took his laptop and continued editing the video, in another file, in case Stiles wasn’t happy with the outcome.

 

He was a pro at using the video editor by now, he knew exactly which transition, effect, lighting and overlay to use, but the scenes were too many so it took him more time than he liked. By the time he was finished was early morning –a.k.a. 4am- so he saved it and went to sleep.

 

**

 

Derek woke up to a growling stomach and the mouthwatering smell of pancakes. He quickly checked the time to find that it was 9:27.

 

He knew he hadn’t slept much, but most days five hours were more than enough.

 

Derek headed to the bathroom first, to be presentable when he gets to the kitchen. Said room was now inhabited by Stiles, who was flipping pancakes, and Laura who was fully dressed and held her bag, looking ready to go to work. They were in the middle of an excitable conversation which contained a lot of flailing and unrecognizable words.

 

Derek wasn’t ready to deal with their morning ramblings. He was tempted to turn around and go back to sleep, but then Laura noticed him and called him over.

 

Stiles turned to smile at him too and that was when Derek realized that Stiles was wearing his _shirt_ and his _sweats._

 

Derek wasn’t sure what was happening in his chest but it was too early to register it. Stiles seemed to notice that Derek’s attention was on his clothes so he shifted uncomfortably. “Uh… Laura came early and she offered to give me a pair of your clothes because mine were a little uncomfortable. Hope you don’t mind?” he asked.

 

Derek looked back to his face. “No, it’s okay.” He forced out.

 

Stiles smiled brightly again and flipped the last pancake.

 

“As much as I loved our conversation, I need to get to work.” Laura said. “It was great to meet you, Stiles.” She added truthfully and drew Stiles in a hug.

 

“Nice to meet you too, I hope we will meet again soon,” Stiles replied and then lowered his voice to a whisper. “Don’t tell Derek, but you are the awesome Hale.”

 

“Heard that!” Derek called from the table where he had already started wolfing down the pancakes.

 

“Serves you right for eating my pancakes without me.” Stiles said and sat on the table next to Derek as Laura left.

**

 

Stiles had barely eaten 3 pancakes before Derek abandoned the kitchen. When he came back, he was holding his laptop which he set in front of Stiles.

 

“So, I kind of edited it all last night.” Derek started and clicked on a video. “I saved it in a different file from the one we edited together, so we can go back to that if you want.” He said and pressed ‘play’.

 

The video started off as they had planned, first came the drums and then the guitar came in. The tune intensified and Stiles’s voice echoed between the instruments.

 

“ _I wish I found some better sounds no one's ever heard,_

_I wish I had a better voice that sang some better words,_

_I wish I found some chords in an order that is new,_

_I wish I didn't have to rhyme every time I sang,_

_I was told when I get older all my fears would shrink,_

_But now I'm insecure and I care what people think.”_

The drums, which they edited a little bit more at the DJ app Derek owned, intensified then at the verse “ _My name's 'Blurryface' and I care what you think_.”

 

And then the music started gradually slowing down on the chorus. After the first chorus the piano became more prominent. The soft melody carried out till the point that the drums and the guitar had dissipated and then Derek’s voice came in.

 

_“Sometimes a certain smell will take me back to when I was young,_

_How come I'm never able to identify where it's coming from,_

_I'd make a candle out of it if I ever found it,_

_Try to sell it, never sell out of it, I'd probably only sell one,_

_It'd be to my sister, 'cause we have the same nose,_

_Same clothes homegrown a stone's throw from a creek we used to roam,_

_But it would remind us of when nothing really mattered,_

_Out of student loans and treehouse homes we all would take the latter.”_

 

Like every song Derek covered, this too was melancholic. Derek’s eyes glittered at the camera, and he played the piano louder. Then Stiles’s guitar came back for another couple of _“My name's 'Blurryface' and I care what you think.”_

 

When the drums joined again, Derek’s and Stiles’s voices mixed over their last chorus.

 

_“We used to play pretend, give each other different names,_

_We would build a rocket ship and then we'd fly it far away,_

_Used to dream of outer space but now they're laughing at our face,_

_Saying, "Wake up, you need to make money.",_

_Yo.”_

The _“Yo”_ was complimented with a last note on the drums and then the video ended with the subscribe page.

 

Stiles stared a few minutes longer than necessary on the blank screen. The video was melancholic and intense the same time. It was the perfect combination of Stiles and Derek. Stiles’s voice was harder and sharper, while Derek’s was melodic and _beautiful_.

 

Stiles could never get used to Derek’s fucking _angelic_ voice. But at the last chorus, their voices mixed together one complimenting the other like they were _fucking meant to be together,_ and Stiles couldn’t process it fast enough.

 

But then his attention was drawn to Derek who was nervously shifting in his chair. “Derek this is _amazing!_ Seriously, I love this!” Stiles exclaimed with a smile and Derek smiled back and blushed.

 

 _Derek_ blushed. Derek _blushed. Derek blushed._

Derek who apparently spent the night making their video, Derek who had been patient with him.

 

Stiles was pretty sure he experienced what girls on the internet have been meaning when commenting on his photos “my ovaries exploded”.

 

And Stiles didn’t even have ovaries!

 

Oh no. Oh no- Stiles recognized the feeling in his stomach, it was the same with the feel he would get until the beginning of high school when he saw Lydia.

 

 _No._ He admitted to having a crush on Derek, _a crush_ , not whatever obsession he had built up for Lydia!

 

This was wrong, so-so wrong. Stiles was 100% screwed.

 

“I’m glad you liked it.” Derek said proudly, and that too made Stiles’s heart flatter.

 

Stiles in return, pretended to choke on his water so that he won’t have to say something that will potentially embarrass him for the rest of his life.

 

It was a good trick as any, the atmosphere got lighter then and it was easier for him to go back to the denial territory (from where he could pine alone later).

 

They went back to talking about who would upload the video when Stiles’s phone alerted him with a text. “Oh, Man, it’s Scott. Trouble with his girlfriend. Again.” Stiles groaned. “Do you have a girlfriend?”

 

Derek frowned. “I did.”

 

Stiles texted a quick reply to Scott before he absently responded to Derek. “Well, figures, with a body like _that_ … did you break up with her?”

 

Derek’s expression turned completely closed off then. “No. She died.” He stated and exited the room without further words and Stiles was left in the kitchen alone. Seconds later he heard a door slamming closed.

 

He gaped at the spot Derek vacated. What was wrong with the man? Why did he always acted up like this?

 

Maybe bringing his dead girlfriend up was not a good idea, but since Derek never mentioned any relationships since he started his YouTube career, Stiles thought it was safe to assume that the wound was old. Not that it meant that Derek shouldn’t be upset about it, of course he should, Scott still spaced out sometimes when he thought of Allison, but leaving and smacking doors? Wasn’t that a little too much?

 

Stiles won’t pretend that he knows how it feels to lose a girlfriend, but he has lost his mother. Yes, he got upset when she was mentioned, and yes, he did turn sad, but if someone unaware of his mother’s death brought it up, Stiles would try to change subject, not throw a tantrum.

 

Stiles sighed and got up to evacuate the kitchen too. He headed back to the guest room, where he had left his bag and changed back to his clothes.

 

When he got back to the recording room to collect his guitar, he found Derek sitting on the chair. “You are leaving?” he asked.

 

“Yeah, the video is done, right?” Derek gave a confused affirmation. “Then I should leave, like I said, I came to New York to take care of something.” Stiles stated and took ahold of his guitar.

 

Derek scowled. “But we haven’t decided yet who is going to upload the video?”

 

Stiles rubbed his face with his free hand. “Yea, about that, seeing that everything was your idea and this is your house, how about you upload it?”

 

Derek clenched his jaw in obvious irritation and nodded.

 

“Right. Guess I’m going to go.” Stiles said and gestured over his shoulder.

 

“Wait, I’ll walk you out.” Derek said with an annoyed look and lead the way to the door.

 

There was a small awkward pause at the door before Stiles said that he was pleased to meet and work with Derek, who agreed and bid him goodbye.

 

As soon as the door was closed, Stiles cursed loudly. 

 

He wasn’t sure how they got from an awkward first meeting, to pleasantly talking, to eating breakfast –when he mooned over Derek just a little-, to being distant and disconnected.

 

It was all too much.

 

He decided he would deal with it later.

 

**

 

Derek was crossed legged on the couch watching a nameless boring movie on TV and eating pizza leftovers, while he waited for the video to be uploaded. And that’s how Laura found him.

 

“What are you watching?” she asked as she sat beside him.

 

Derek didn’t turn to her, but shrugged in reply.

 

“Oh no.” she said. “Oh, no-no! What are you doing?”

 

Derek looked at her then with a confused look. “Watching TV?”

 

“No, I am talking about you obviously being upset, really, this movie, Derek? And pizza leftovers? Really?”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“I _told you_ , I see you are upset, why?” Laura demanded.

 

Derek rolled his eyes. “I am not upset.”

 

“Yes, you are! You have the same look on your face with when you were six and Peter took your toy car and declared it his. So, what is wrong?” Laura insisted.

 

“Nothing.”

 

Laura sighed and put an arm around his shoulders. “Come on, you know hiding your emotions won’t help you, please, I only want to help you, just tell me what happened.”

 

Derek sighed tiredly at her soft approach. “Nothing happened. Not really.” He said and fidgeted with his sleeve. “I just… there was something Stiles said.”

 

“What did he say?”

 

“Well, he has a gift of bringing up all the worse topics, like when he asked about… mum and dad… and Paige. But when he asked me if I had a girlfriend, he said ‘ _of course, with a body like that’_.” Derek explained slowly.

 

Laura frowned. “I fail to see something wrong with that.”

 

Derek gave her a quizzical look. “He literally objectified my body?” he said in a ‘duh’ tone.

 

“Or he just thinks you look good?” Laura countered.

 

“How does that change anything?”

 

“Derek, you are the prettiest princess, what he meant was that anyone would want to be with you.” Laura explained slowly.

 

“So you are saying, that people like me because I am _pretty_?” Derek stressed.

 

“No, you idiot! Being attractive is an advantage, but no one would stay in a relationship just for your body. You are a grown man, I thought you already knew the whole ‘ _No one falls in love with your personality at first sight_ ’. Stiles asked if you had a girlfriend, not a fuckbuddy.” Laura said in a rush and Derek looked away. “What happened after that?”

 

Derek shrugged. “Stiles left.”

 

“Just like that? He stood up and left?”

 

Derek hesitated. “Not exactly? I kind of snapped at him and then he left.”

 

“ _Derek!_ Why would you do that _?_ ” Laura face-palmed.

 

“I got upset, I didn’t know he would take it to heart!” Derek defended.

 

“ _Oh_ _my god_! You two are hopeless! I shouldn’t have left, I should have stayed to watch over you, to make sure you behave!” Derek snorted at her remark and she slapped his hand. “Laugh all you want, but I guarantee this is going to work out whether you want it or not.” She said and left the room. “Call me over when the video is uploaded.” She yelled over her shoulder.

 

Derek shook his head and went back to eating.

 

**

 

The video turned out to be _phenomenal_. It went viral so fast, it almost made Derek dizzy.

 

The fans absolutely loved it and overall the reaction to their collaboration was 98.7% positive. Derek gained over 10,000 subscribers in 24 hours and his messages _exploded._ People talked about how well their voices for and how perfect and unique the diversity in the music made the song.

 

Derek actually received so much fan-mail that he had to use up the quest room as a storage until he could read them.

 

Laura was so happy with him that she made him a cake.

 

**

 

A week later Derek woke up feeling a heavy weight resting on his back. He shifted and groaned unhappily, at the pressure the body was giving to his ribs. When he turned his head he met Laura’s sleeping face and he huffed.

 

 He playfully shoved her off and she almost fell off the bed in the motion. She was awaken instantly and scowling in his face. “You asshole!”

 

“I wasn’t the one invading another person’s bed.” He said and shrugged.

 

Laura groaned. “I hate you, I came for the cuddles and what do I get? A shove. You are a bad baby brother, you are supposed to be small and fluffy.”

 

Derek couldn’t normally understand her words, honestly most of the time she didn’t make sense, but on mornings it was worse. “Small and fluffy? Are you listening to yourself?”

 

Laura pouted. “I wouldn’t have to be the one cuddling you, if you had done your job right!” she protested.

 

Derek frowned. Laura had obviously undergone head trauma or something equally bad. He voiced his concern and tried to look under her hair for evidence but she kicked his ribs so hard he had to recoil. “Whatever, what do you mean?”

 

Laura huffed. “ _Stiles_! Your chemistry was unbearable. Your video is viral, why can’t you at least call him? He was totally flirting with you, he could have been the one cuddling you! Plus he is totally your type.”

 

“I have a type?” Derek asked quizzically.

 

Laura smacked his head softly. “That’s what you get from the whole thing?”

 

“We didn’t flirt!” Derek said in lieu of a reply.

 

“Yeah obviously not, I was not there that morning and I don’t _know_ you. Nope. I don’t.” She exclaimed dramatically.

 

“Laura, _no_! We didn’t flirt, he doesn’t even like men!” Derek said feeling mortified.

 

Laura smirked. “So you do admit you like him.”

 

“What? No!”

 

Laura laughed and pointed at him childishly. “Yes! I _knew_ you had a crush on him since I caught you batting your eyes at his profile picture like some high school girl. This is great, when are you asking him out?”

 

“I’m not!” Derek yelled in frustration.

 

“Derek!”

 

“Laura!” he warned and she narrowed her eyes at him.

 

She crossed her arms in defiance and looked away. “Fine. Have it your way. Pine all you want, see if I care.”

 

“ _’See if I care’_? You literally just spent 5 minutes shouting off in my ears.”

 

“That’s beside the point.” She claimed and left the room. “I am going to make breakfast.” She yelled from the hall.

 

Derek knew he was supposed to start working on his next cover, but by the night, he kept getting distracted by Laura’s words.

 

After he stopped playing to look at the wall for the 6th time, he decided to spend some time online. And that’s how he found Stiles’s vlog.

 

It was mostly him going through his day until he set his mind to opening fan-mail. When he read one about the video he made with Derek he put the letter aside to talk a little to the camera. “So, this is a great opportunity for me to say that working with Derek had been quite an experience. He was nice and hearing his voice live was like a milestone being completed for me. You don’t even know, in person, he sounds so much purer, I almost wanted to cry, let me tell you.” He stopped to laugh. “Anyway, I wanted to thank him and his sister, Laura, for having me, and –frankly- putting up with me. It was amazing, and seeing that you all liked it this much, I hope we will work together again sometime.” He added and went back to his fan-mail for the rest of his video.

 

But Derek didn’t really notice, because Stiles thought he was _nice_ and that his voice was _pure_ and he _wanted to do another collab_!

 

Derek couldn’t stop the wide grin from forming on his face and he decided that maybe he should stop for the night.

 

He couldn’t play such a sad song when he was filled with urgency and… _excitement_.

 

So he turned off his laptop and headed to his room.

 

**

 

Stiles’s nap time was rudely interrupted by a notification on his phone.

 

He cursed himself from forgetting to turn the sound off - _again-_ and tried to get some more sleep.

 

But here was the thing, when Stiles woke up, he couldn’t get back to sleep that easily. So he ended up twisting and turning in his covers until he sighed dramatically and gave up.

 

He retrieved his phone and unlocked it to see what was so important to interrupt his precious sleep.

 

It was from YouTube, a notification that Derek had uploaded a new video. Just like that, excitement erased the feeling of irritation that had settled upon him. He always got excited with Derek’s videos, even before he met him and even before he uploaded his first video. So he plugged in his headphones and put the video on.

 

He was surprised when he read the title _‘Derek Hale – Circles (Hollywood Undead cover)’_. He didn’t know Derek listened to that kind of music, but then again the song was slow and depressing so Stiles figured, he shouldn’t really question it.

 

The video was filled with dark colors. Derek was wearing a dark-blue shirt and the green wall behind him was filtered to be pitch black.

 

It started with Derek’s hands softly touching the keys of his piano. Then the scene changed and Derek’s face came into view. His soft voice rang somehow strongly above the notes and his sincere eyes bore into the camera.

_“Take my hand lets go, somewhere we can rest our souls._

_We'll sit where it's warm, you say look we're here alone.”_

When he stopped that verse, there came a scene with him skillfully playing the violin. And then he sang the first chorus.

_“I was running in circles, I hurt myself,_

_Just to find my purpose._

_Everything was so worthless, I didn't deserve this,_

_But to me you were perfect.”_

 

His face wasn’t captured during the chorus, where the scenes altered between him playing the violin or the piano, but then on the next verse, the camera was slowly zooming in.

 

_“It feels like I'm killing myself, just willing myself._

_Just to pray for some help._

_I'd give it all just to have, have your eternity._

_‘Cause it's all that assures me._

_It's worth all that hurts me._

_I'd give you my heart, and I'd let you just hold it._

_I'd give you my soul, but I already sold it.”_

He sang softly and significantly slower that the original song.

_“On that day, that day I walked away in December,_

_I will always remember, I'll regret it forever._

_I remember brown eyes, so sad and blue skies._

_Turned to darkness and night, I'm so sick of the fight._

_I won't breathe unless you breathe, won't bleed unless you bleed._

_Won't be unless you be, till I'm gone and I can sleep.”_

His eyes visibly watered then and the scene changed, going back to him playing and singing the chorus one last time.

 

_“I've gone away, seen better times in yesterday._

_It's hard to say, that everything will be okay.”_

He sang the last verse so emotionally that his watering eyes let go and twin tears escaped. They merely run halfway down his nose level before the scene was cut off and on came the subscribe page.

 

Stiles was utterly bewildered. The song held so much emotion, so much _pain_.

 

The video had made himself tear up too. It left him filled with a strange ache and it made him think of his mother. It made a surge of loss to overwhelm him, in a way he just knew, that Derek sang this song for someone.

 

It was something all the songs Derek song’s had. A certain truth, an experience.

 

It was exactly what made Stiles obsessed with his videos from the start.

 

Derek was one of the Youtubers that Stiles looked up to. He started posting videos only a few years before Stiles did and if he was honest, Derek actually inspired him to start. At first, Stiles thought he couldn’t make it, because his voice was not made for ballads, he was certainly no one with pure talent, like Derek was, but he knew how to play the guitar and drums and he had some vocal lessons. But watching Derek? It gave him a reason to try, to watch tutorials on how to do the screamo on several songs, to make himself better, until he built enough courage to upload his first video.

 

So Derek wasn’t just his crush –and newly developed obsession- he was his inspiration.

 

Hearing that cover made him want to call Derek to check up on him, but then he scolded himself. By now he knew Derek didn’t react nicely to inappropriate questions.

 

Plus, he wasn’t sure his call would be welcome, not when Derek was cold when he met him.

 

So he sighed in defeat and went to the kitchen to eat something.

 

**

 

Derek was anxious. He wasn’t confident this would work out, but like Laura said, he, at least, needed to try.

 

So he was ready to do it. He took the phone and dialed a number he had never dialed before.

 

Stiles answered on the second ring. _“Hello?”_

 

“Hey, Stiles, it’s Derek.”

 

 _“I know, I have you in my contacts.”_ Stiles said and chuckled. _“What’s up?”_

 

Derek took a calming breath. “I was thinking about how much positivity our last video received.” He said a bit awkwardly.

 

 _“I know, right? People probably love it more than us!”_ Stiles exclaimed excitedly.

 

“Yeah…” Derek said. “Maybe… I thought that we could…” Derek stopped to find the courage to finish the sentence. Stiles didn’t say anything, he just waited for him to finish. “Maybe we could do another.”

 

The silence dragged on for a few more seconds before Stiles spoke up again. “ _You want to? I mean, yes! I would like to collaborate with you again.”_ He blurted.

 

Derek smiled then. “I was thinking about visiting California in a few days… maybe we could do it then… if you aren’t busy, of course.”

 

 _“No, no, dude. I am free whenever!”_ Stiles responded almost eagerly.

 

“Alright, I am thinking about… Monday? Is that okay?”

 

 _“Yeah, sure. Maybe this time we should think about the song before we actually meet, though.”_ Stiles pointed out.

 

“Yeah, about that… I have an idea.” Derek started hesitantly. “I thought about it and I think we should do ‘On My Own’ by Ashes Remain. It had been on my wish-list for a while, but it didn’t feel the same with just a piano.”

 

Stiles had a moment to think about it and recall the song before he replied. “ _I think it’s a great idea. How about I email you further ideas about the music and stuff? Maybe we can figure the music out without time pressing down on us like that.”_

“Okay, I would like that.” Derek agreed.

 

After that, they said their goodbyes and hung up.

 

**

 

Derek was filled with dread when he stood out of Stiles’s door.

 

It was weird being back in Beacon Hills. This place hadn’t been his home since he was 18 and he hadn’t stepped a foot there since his parent’s funeral.

 

It was full of memories. He wasn’t sure if they were happy or sad memories –or both- but it made his stomach twist with longing. The woods remind him of his house, of his last words to his parents. Of his fight with them for something as simple as the job, he intended on taking once he got to New York. But it also reminded him of hide and seek, of picnics, of family celebrations.

 

The town was mostly the same. He didn’t recognize some shops, but the old bakery is still there, the ice cream parlor that Cora used to swear it had the best ice-cream in the world is still standing proud.

 

His favorite park was still the same, filled with families and happy kids.

 

It all made Derek’s stomach twist further.

 

He decided to buy some ice-cream for Stiles as a thank you for being invited to his home.

 

When Stiles had said he lived in California, Derek hadn’t expected that he lived in Beacon Hills, but he thought he should have expected it, how many Stilinskis could there be in California, when Sheriff Stilinski lived in Beacon Hills?

 

Derek had shaken his head and opened Google Maps to find Stiles’s house.

 

It wasn’t all that hard, and he was soon standing outside of Stiles’s door holding ice-cream even though it wasn’t hot outside.

 

He sighed and rang the bell. At first nothing happened but then there was a distinct sound of feet pounding and a loud _thump_ followed by angry curses right behind the door. Soon it was dragged open and Stiles with a pained smile came into view.

 

He was wearing a pair of cropped black jeans and a green Henley while he was rubbing his right hip in a soothing motion. “Hey!” he said and opened the door wider and stepped aside. “Come in.”

 

“Hi.” Derek replied and got in the house.

 

Stiles home was… different from what he imagined. It was full of earthy colors and it gave off a homey vibe. Not everything matched completely, but it didn’t strike badly.

 

“Here.” Derek said and thrust the ice-cream into Stiles’s hands.

 

Stiles frowned at it. “You didn’t have to.” He said and Derek just shrugged. “Why ice-cream, though, it’s not summer.” He asked.

 

Derek shrugged again. “It was always my favorite ice-cream parlor.”

 

“Your favorite? Have you been in Beacon Hills before?” Stiles asked curiously.

 

“I used to live here before I moved to New York for my studies.”

 

Stiles looked shocked. “Oh. _Oh_! You are Derek Hale. _Hale_. How did I never notice that?” he asked rhetorically.

 

Derek felt uneasy then. Of course, Stiles remembered his family. Everyone in this small stupid town did. There was a reason he didn’t talk about his family, he didn’t want people to look at him as the fragile orphan.

 

But then again, Stiles didn’t look at him with pity, but rather with curiosity. “Huh.” He muttered and then his expression went back to carefree. “I’m going to put this in the freezer, make yourself comfortable.”

 

Derek spent the short amount of time Stiles was away to survey the photos on the walls. They all seemed to hold different emotions. The majority of the ones on the bookcase were of Stiles and his parents, while those on the tables and next to the TV where mostly of Stiles and friends.

 

When Stiles was back, though, he took Derek to the recording room where they could actually do what Derek had travelled to California for.

 

This time, things went smoother, the first time they worked together, they were under pressure from the time and they had only just met.

 

But this 2nd song was easier to work with. It’s was smaller in length, and it was already rock enough for Stiles to be satisfied. Once more they divided the song. They decide to sing the choruses together while Stiles took the first verse, and Derek took the verse right after the first chorus.

 

Like before, they recorded the music first. They had already rehearsed it alone so it didn’t take long to have it ready, so then they placed the cameras in the same place and begun filming.

 

It took less for them to finish this time, even if they had a prolonged lunch time.

 

By nine pm they were almost done with the editing too and Derek was progressively more and more tired and grumpy. So Stiles decided to call it a night and order take out like Derek had done for him when they were at his house.

 

He claimed that he should do the rest of the editing himself, since last time Derek did all the work.

 

At first, Derek complained and protested moodily, but Stiles didn’t back down.

 

He had already decided to do his best, he would edit the shit out of their video in a way that Derek would love it.

 

**

 

Day No.2 in California found Derek sleeping in until midday in his luxurious hotel room.

 

When he was awake enough, he turned his laptop on checked his notifications. The first one to catch his attention was –of course- Stiles’s email about the edited video.

 

He quickly downloaded the video with eager excitement. When it was done, he opened the file nervously.

 

The first half of the video was mostly the same with how they left it, it started with fast changing of scenes, and the music came on. Stiles’s voice came on seconds later singing gently the words.

 

_“There's gotta be another way out,_

_I've been stuck in a cage with my doubt,_

_I've tried forever getting out on my own._

_But every time I do this my way,_

_I get caught in the lies of the enemy,_

_I lay my troubles down,_

_I'm ready for you now.”_

At the last line, his eyes locked on Derek’s from with a meaningful glance that Derek couldn’t understand. Then came the first chorus in which they sang together rhythmically, their voices joining in and mixing together like they were always meant to. This song was far more energetic than their previous one, and probably the most energetic Derek had ever participated in. The scenes were fast and the lightning came and went, but it did slow down considerably for Derek’s part.

 

_“Every little thing that I've known is everything I need to let go,_

_You're so much bigger than the world I have made,_

_So I surrender my soul,_

_I'm reaching out for your hope,_

_I lay my weapons down,_

_I'm ready for you now.”_

Derek’s part was emotional as always and he could see the way Stiles’s soft notes complimented it. At the last line, he was looking right at Stiles as they had planned and his look was longing, in a way that they hadn’t talked about, and Derek hoped no-one saw.

 

Then the music picked up and the chorus picked up once more and they ended up singing together for the rest of the song.

 

The editing was flawless, it showed great skill and it flattered their skills. It was intense, emotional and energetic.

 

All in all, it was perfect and Derek loved every second of it.

 

So he replied to Stiles’s email with truthful words and much deserved praises.

 

**

 

Their second video was as much successful as the first one. People went on and on about how great it was and it was perfect.

 

But this time the comments section was… weird.

 

Fans went from awed to _inspired_. Not inspired like wanting to sing or do something creative, but rather in a way to _daydream_.

 

They created a tag. It took a while for Derek to understand it, but by day three after they uploaded the video on Stiles’s channel, the #sterek tag was a worldwide trend on twitter and was not a name for their collab, despite to what Derek assumed first, no, it was their _shipname_.

 

At least that was what Erica said.

 

He didn’t understand the implications of the tag until he thoughtfully checked his social media accounts.

 

That was when he realized that his fans were not just daydreaming, but they were actually getting creative if all the art they send him was anything to go by.

 

Most of the artworks were skilled and amazing, even if they were based on his nonexistent relationship with Stiles, but some fans… they took it to another level. Quite literally. Derek was no _prude_ , despite what Laura and Erica thought, but seeing _porn_ featuring him and Stiles was enough for him to blush furiously and shut down his computer.

 

Fans kept calling them out for looking with ‘heart eyes’ at each other, saying that Stiles blushes when he talks about Derek on vlogs, pointing out the way some of the lyrics at the 2nd song were _directed_ to each other.

 

Derek thought it was a fling, people would forget it, but as time went on they became more prominent.

 

_Derek even met fans on the way to the grocery store with shirts with art of him and Stiles, or a cheeky text with their tag._

He wasn’t sure how he felt about people vouching for him to get together with Stiles. It made him excited that they saw potential in them and he wanted to believe them. But it also made him self-conscious whenever Stiles was mentioned.

 

He didn’t know how to act around Stiles. On the one hand, he wanted to give in and do what fans wanted him to do, but at the same time, Stiles wasn’t talking about it and he didn’t know if that meant that he was purposively avoiding it.

 

But something really good came out of it. After the second video, Stiles texted Derek to celebrate the first thousand views and somehow, it became a thing between them.

 

Stiles now texted him the most random things at all times and Derek _loved it._

The fact that Derek had a crush on Stiles had nothing to do with that either, of course. He was 100% sure it was only because he found Stiles amusing. Nothing else, really.

 

Or he thought so until Stiles uploaded the song ‘ _Tear In My Heart’_ by Twenty One Pilots. In that video he was _astounding._

He was bouncing everywhere full of energy and his hair was ruffled and messy like he had just woken up, while his clothes were so tight he was outright competing the clothes Erica always bout for him because “it cupped his body in all the right places”.

 

 _But_ he also did the thing with the black paint Tyler did in the music video and he looked so attractive that Derek had to pause the video to remind himself that no he wasn’t allowed to objectify his… _friend_.

 

It was not right to think about Stiles like that, when Stiles never showed any interest in him, and especially when all he had been was nice and patient with Derek.

 

**

 

Boyd was looking at him from the couch.

 

“What?” Derek asked after he was too distracted to practice the song more.

 

“You are going to cover _Talk Me Down._ ” Boyd said.

 

Derek gave him a confused look. “I am.”

 

Boyd regarded him silently for a little more. “Are we still pretending not to notice that you are pinning over Stilinski?”

 

Derek’s fingers tensed and his piano let an irritated sound. “ _What_?”

 

“It is distracting. If you like him, why are you not telling him? It’s not like you don’t text all day.”

 

“It’s not like that.”

 

Boyd raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. “Then how is it? You are intending on singing a _love song_ that everyone will question since the singer is openly gay and the music video features a gay relationship. You are telling me you aren’t doing that on purpose.”

 

Derek looked away.

 

“If you want him to know you don’t have to tell him with Morse language, you could just text him.”

 

“He is not interested.” Derek gritted out. “And, besides, remember what the therapist said? Singing is my coping mechanism. I sing to express _feelings_ , Boyd.”

 

“So is this what this is about? Are you taking it off your system?” Boyd deduced.

 

Derek clenched his jaw. “No. End of discussion.” He said firmly and went back to playing.

 

 

**

 

Like Boyd assumed, everyone question his song choice. Sterek fans went crazy about that being a sign of their relationship and Derek didn’t know how to deal with that.

 

Stiles had texted him almost immediately after he uploaded the video and congratulated him without a word on the song choice.

 

Derek had conflicted feelings about that. Like Boyd had implied, he did choose the song for a reason more than just because he liked it.

 

But Stiles ended up telling him about the surprise party he was planning for Scott rather than commenting on anything having to do with that.

 

**

 

Stiles had just uploaded his new cover, ‘ _Nicotine_ ’ by Panic! At the Disco, and yet he couldn’t focus on that.

 

Not when Derek had uploaded the ‘ _Talk Me Down’_ by Troye Sivan cover.

 

It was painful. The man didn’t even seem to notice the way his every move fucking affected Stiles’s mental health.

 

The worst part was that now that they texted daily, Stiles had tried, _he had tried so hard,_ to flirt with him but Derek didn’t notice or didn’t care.

 

So Stiles had given up, maybe Stiles –and all the fans- had been wrong. Maybe there wasn’t anything between them other than wishful thinking.

 

But then Derek just uploaded that video like he meant something, _but he didn’t_.

 

Stiles checked, really, he sent a text almost immediately but Derek was only polite and gladly took the chance to talk about Scott’s birthday party.

 

It was frustrating, to say the least.

 

But Stiles had a plan, okay?

 

He didn’t just mention Scott’s birthday without a reason. No. He was going to organize the best fucking surprise party for his best friend in which Derek _will_ come because Stiles will _make_ him.

 

And when they meet again, Stiles would move to phase two. Phase two is the one where he uses all his resources to find out how invested Derek feels in their nonexistent relationship. _Then_ , if and only if, that fails to give him an answer, he will force Danny to help him.

 

It was a brilliant plan.

 

And Stiles could see it was already working. Mostly. The plan didn’t mention anything about Stiles wanting to cry like a baby over a video.

 

But it was okay. A plan is a plan and this one is the master plan.

 

He totally has everything under control.

 

**

 

He doesn’t have anything under any control!

 

Phase one was completed, but at what cost? At the cost of Stiles’s mental and physical health.

 

Derek showed up looking as hot as burning lava and smiling so brightly, the sun should wear sunglasses.

 

It was overwhelming.

 

And since he only knew Stiles, he mostly stuck next to him the whole night. But he wasn’t a burden, no, he was fucking talkative. He _socialized_ and _talked_ with people and Stiles had to stop for a few minutes to analyze the situation.

 

And then he was ready to move on to phase two. He would pretend to be drunker than he is to see if Derek reacts to his flirting abilities.

 

Lydia may be disapproving of this plan, but it isn’t like she has any better ideas. Or at least ideas Stiles likes.

 

Three hours later, Stiles is thinking about summoning Danny.

 

Derek didn’t notice his flirting over his drunken façade. He kept giving him water and making him sit still. He was _patient_ and he gently laughed when Stiles said his eyes were more beautiful than the ocean, and he loved the ocean.

 

This was a _disaster_.

 

He was ready to fetch Danny just as Derek declared that he had to leave.

 

Derek wasn’t allowed to leave without permission! Stiles told him so.

 

“Stiles, it’s late. Maybe you should go home too.” Derek said.

 

“But, I can’t! It’s Scott’s birthday, the party _I_ organized! I can’t leave, Derek, _no_!” Stiles protested.

 

“But Scott just left with that girl… Kira. Almost everyone is gone.” Derek reasoned.

 

“What? Where did Scott go? He lives here, he can’t leave!”

 

“He did, though. Did you drive here?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Okay, give me your keys.” Derek said and opened his palm to be handed the keys.

 

Stiles frowned. “I can drive.”

 

“No, you are drunk. I will take you home. You leave close to my hotel too. I will walk there.” Derek said patiently.

 

“But this wasn’t in the _plan_!”

 

“New plan, you give me your keys and I drive your ass home.”

 

“My great, amazing, squeezable ass.” Stiles pointed out with a small twerk.

 

“You are wasted.”

 

“I am not _that_ drunk!” Stiles and rolled his eyes so hard he almost got nauseous. Then he frowned and touched his face. “Am I?”

 

“Keys.” Derek demanded.

 

“You’ll have to take them yourself, I ain’t giving you my keys willingly.” Stiles wiggled his eyebrows playfully.

 

Derek sighed dramatically. “Where are they then?”

 

“Back pocket.” Stiles said with a wink.

 

“ _Stiles!”_

 

“Fine, ruin all my fun.” Stiles said and fished his keys.

**

 

Stiles almost fell asleep against the passenger window before he shook himself. He couldn’t sleep when Derek was there.

 

He formed a new plan that would work 100%.

 

He put on music to distract him from sleeping and proceeded on singing loudly off-key.

 

“And here I thought you were a _singer._ ” Derek said teasingly.

 

“Technically I am a YouTuber, not a singer.” Stiles corrected absently before he frowned. “Wait, did you insult my singing abilities?”

 

“Obviously.”

 

Stiles gasped. “Dishonor! Dishonor on _you_ , dishonor on your _cow_!”

 

“Really, Stiles? Mulan?” Derek chuckled.

 

Stiles ignored the comment. “I’ll show you singing.” Stiles said and picked the volume up. “Get ready ‘cause I love this song.” He cleared his throat and started singing.

“ _I sold my soul to a three-piece and he told me I was holy_

_He's got me down on both knees, but it's the devil that's tryna,_

_Hold me down, hold me down_

_Sneaking out the back door, make no sound_

_Knock me out, knock me out_

_Saying that I want more, this is what I live for.”_

 

He even went as far as to thrust his hips along with the notes and he seductively blinked at Derek who wasn’t paying him any attention.

 

“Okay, enough, I take it back, you win, you can sing.” Derek said before Stiles could continue to the next verse. He sounded weirdly strained and Stiles looked at him curiously.

 

When he opened his mouth to call him on it, the car stopped as they apparently arrived at Stiles’s home.

 

All thoughts about asking Derek about his reaction went out of the window because this was his chance to work on plan No.2.

 

Stiles smirked deviously and Derek had barely enough time to frown before Stiles dived in and connected their mouths. He used a little more force than necessary, which led to knocking their noses together. But Derek gasped in surprise and Stiles thought that he should take advantage of it and make up for the awkward initiation of their kiss. He slipped his tongue between Derek’s lips and licked all over his mouth while he moaned in pleasure.

 

But before he could do anything else, he was shoved back. His back hit the door and the handle dug into his ribs. He winced in the momentary pain, but when he looked up to Derek to protest, he felt like he was drenched in cold water.

 

Derek didn’t look like he was enjoying the situation at all, he was throwing murderous glares at him and he had his hand over his mouth.

 

Stiles immediately felt like the world was crashing upon him. “I- I’m sorry.” He whispered urgently.

 

Derek clenched his jaw and looked out of the window. “No. It’s okay.” He said and got out of the car before Stiles could say anything.

 

Stiles exited the car too –and almost face planted on the floor. “Derek.” He called but Derek silenced him.

 

“Don’t worry about it. Just go home.” He said in a tone so defeated that Stiles needed to fix it, but when he almost took a step toward than away from Derek, he was met with a glare and a _growl_.

 

“Fine.” Stiles agreed. “Good night, Derek. Thank you for being here today.” He added and went home like he was ordered to.

 

Before he lied in bed, he sent a text with a simple “Sorry”, and turned his phone off.

 

**

 

A week after their kiss, Derek was lying on his bed looking at the wall on his right and listening to a random playlist.

 

Stiles hadn’t texted him anything much after the last “Sorry” one. Their conversations were stilled and awkward now and Derek- he couldn’t. He couldn’t stop thinking about that night.

 

Stiles had spent the entire night drunkenly saying nonsense. And then he sang the song ‘ _Hold Me_ _Down_ ’ by Halsey and put on a full show by thrusting his hips and singing fucking seductively. And then he kissed him.

 

It was what Derek had been dreaming about since they started texting back and forth, but he couldn’t shake the feeling of wrongness at the kiss.

 

Stiles was clearly not in his right mind, it was obvious, and Derek couldn’t take advantage of him when he was at his most vulnerable.

 

Derek knew he had done the right thing, but yet he felt horrible.

 

He felt as if he was torn apart. The last month had been filled with Stiles’s random texts and they had built up a weird bond made of friendship. And now, they weren’t even _talking_.

 

If Derek could, he would change that. If he could go back in time he would stop himself from listening to Laura and Erica. He would stop them from telling him it was worth it to go back and forth to California for the birthday of the best friend of his _crush_. He would stop Laura for encouraging him to be social and charming and he would stop Erica from making him buy new clothes just for the occasion.

 

If he could, he would stop himself from feeling like he messed up. If he could, he would stop himself from secretly letting himself cry when Laura left the house.

 

He knew what this was. Heartbreak. But why was he heartbroken when he was never in a relationship with Stiles? Why was he so fucking sad when he was the one that stopped Stiles?

 

So Derek decided to cope with it the best way he could. He would sing a song.

 

**

 

Just as Stiles pressed ‘Publish’ of his new cover, ‘ _Just One Yesterday’_ by Fall Out Boy, a notification email came up.

 

He already knew who it was from. It was Friday. The day Derek always uploaded a song on.

 

Stiles sighed and pressed play.

 

He was covering ‘ _Without You_ ’ by Ashes Remain. The video was black and white. It started with a parametrical view of Derek playing the piano. Derek looked handsome as always, but there was something about his expression that Stiles couldn’t put his finger on.

 

“ _Underneath the cold November sky, I’ll wait for you._

_As the pages of my life roll by, I’ll wait for you._

_I’m so desperate just to see your face, meet me in this broken place._ ”

Derek’s voice soothed the notes gently until the chorus, where his voice turned full of emotion.

 

“ _Hold me now, I need to feel you,_

_Show me how to make it new again._

_There’s no one I can run to and nothing I could ever do._

_I’m nowhere if I’m here without you._ ”

There was a small pause there and the music picked up.

_“I’m tired of running and wrestling with these angels,_

_I lay down my life and I surrender”_

He nearly yelled at the microphone passionately and then repeated the chorus one last time with tearful eyes.

 

After it ended, Stiles stared at the black screen for longer than necessary before he pressed replay again and again and again until he too let his eyes fill with tears out of raw emotion.

**

 

People noticed, of course. Most of Stiles’s inbox was filled with questions about the breakup he never went through of the relationship he never had.

 

Stiles didn’t blame them. Derek and he didn’t do a good work of concealing the fact that something was wrong between them.

 

And Lydia, apparently, has had enough. She spent a full hour screaming in his ear about how much of an idiot he was and how he should _fix it already_.

 

He didn’t know how, though.

 

Until Lydia thrust two tickets in his face and demanded that he would depart for New York _immediately_ and come back with a boyfriend or not come back at all.

 

She threatened him with a painful, slow death, which she described in great detail, if the money she spent on tickets got wasted.

 

It’s not like he leaves him any choice so he makes the trip.

 

**

 

Derek was not in the mood to talk to anyone that morning. Yet the doorbell was being abused the past minutes and he couldn’t stand it anymore.

 

Erica seemed really persistent today. It almost amazed him why she didn’t use the spare key she had conjured up two years ago.

 

It was annoying.

 

When he got to the door, he ripped it open with an annoyed “What?”. What he saw at the other side of the door, though, surprised him. It was not Erica, it was _Stiles_.

 

Derek blinked a few times to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating.

 

Stiles shifted from foot to foot awkwardly. “Uh… is this a bad time?”

 

“No.” Derek said a bit too fast but didn’t move otherwise until Stiles shifted some more. “Oh, right. Come in.” he added and moved away.

 

Stiles bit his lip nervously and got in the house. “I’m sorry to show up uninvited.”

 

“I didn’t know you were in New York.” Derek said instead of answering.

 

“Yeah… it was sudden. Actually. I am here to tell you that I am sorry.”

 

“You came all the way up here to say sorry?” Derek asked with disbelief evident in his voice.

 

“Not exactly. I came here to make things right.” Stiles said and paused to think about what to say next. “You said you sing what you feel like, right?”

 

Derek shifted uncomfortably. “Yes?”

 

“Then why did you sing that song? Why did you sing _Without You_? Who did you sing for?” Derek’s heart started pounding uncomfortably fast. He was ready to refuse to answer but then Stiles whispered “Please, tell me.” And that just did it for Derek.

 

“You. I sang it for you. I chose that song because I am tired of hiding the way I feel. I am tired of being alone.” He blurted honestly while his heart clenched with each word he uttered.

 

Stiles’s expression turned pained. “God, Derek. You are not alone.”

 

“Yes, I am. I have been for a long time. I don’t even open up to my sister anymore and it _hurts_ me.” Derek whispered. “I am detached and alone and _broken._ ”

 

“Derek.” Stiles chocked out and hugged him close. Derek stiffened at the hug; he wasn’t used to having such close contact with anyone who wasn’t his sister or their three friends.

 

But then he found himself relaxing in Stiles’s hold. He found comfort in his warm body that held him close.

 

“Why did you push me away that night?” Stiles whispered into Derek’s ear.

 

“You were drunk. I couldn’t let you do something you would regret.” Derek admitted.

 

Stiles broke the hug to look at Derek. “Why would I regret kissing you?”

 

Derek frowned. “What do you mean? Why wouldn’t you? You don’t want me.”

 

Stiles scowled then. “You don’t get to assume what I want. If I didn’t want you, I wouldn’t have done it. If I didn’t want you, I wouldn’t have spent the whole night flirting with you. Hell, I would have spent half of my texts being suggestive.”

 

Derek blinked in shock then. “What are you saying?”

 

“I am saying that I am in love with you. I am saying I fell for you hard and fast and at first I didn’t know how to deal with it but then I settled with us being friends at least. And now I don’t know what we are and it’s _killing me_.” Stiles’s voice broke in the last words. “Say something!” He demanded when Derek didn’t say anything after the confession.

 

“I don’t want us to be friends.” Derek stated and before Stiles face could do more than just fall, he went on. “I want us to be together.”

 

Stiles stared at him in disbelief. “You- really?”

 

“Really.” Derek assured.

 

Stiles smiled so widely that his face almost broke in two and Derek found himself returning it. “Can I ask for something?” he asked and Derek nodded. “Can I kiss you?”

 

Derek nodded at that too and then he was being kissed.

 

This kiss was a lot better than their last one. Stiles tasted like coffee and sugar instead of alcohol and cheap snacks and his lips were soft and hesitant instead of dominating and rough. 

 

It was perfect.

 

**

 

It took them a month to decide how they could announce their relationship to YouTube but in the end, Stiles had an idea.

 

An idea that he didn’t consult with Derek. Derek had just woken up by his ringing phone when Stiles talked his ear off excitedly.

 

“Slow down.” Derek growled sleepily.

 

“ _I uploaded a video. Go watch it_.” Stiles said this time slower. “ _Now._ ” He added and hung up.

 

Derek didn’t know what the fuss was about until he saw the title. _Stiles Stilinski | For Him. (Troye Sivan Cover)._

 

The video featured Stiles on a high chair along with a classic guitar playing the soft notes, something that came to a striking contrast with every other cover he has uploaded.

  _“We are runnin' so fast and we never look back,_

_And whatever I lack, you make up,_

_We make a really good team, though not everyone sees,_

_We got this crazy chemistry between us._

_You don't have to say, "I love you," to say I love you._

_Forget all the shooting stars and all the silver moons,_

_We've been making shades of purple out of red and blue,_

_Sickeningly sweet like honey, don't need money,_

_All I need is you.”_

He paused a little to smile on the camera happily while playing the guitar before he went on again.

_“We try staying up late, but we both are light weights,_

_Yeah we get off our face, too easy and we take jokes way too far,_

_'Cause sometimes living's too hard,_

_We're like two halves of one heart”_

He sang and then went back to the chorus for one last time.

 

It felt surreal to watch Stiles sing something that wasn’t remotely metal or rock, but he was right there playing his guitar like he was the happiest man alive while he sang a sweet song that was _dedicated to Derek_.

 

It did things to Derek’s mind. It left him with a euphoric feeling, Stiles’s voice echoing in his mind.

 

This was probably the best thing that happened to him in years. God, he loved Stiles.

 

The last thought made him pause a little. He wasn’t sure when he came to love him, but he did. And he wasn’t sure how to deal with that.

 

Derek decided for a start to call Stiles again regarding the song.

 

**

 

Stiles was scrolling through his social media a week after he uploaded his new cover.

 

His subscriber count had been reduced by a few thousand, but he couldn’t bring himself to care, if people were homophobic enough to unsubscribe him for uploading a cover over a person that mattered this much to him, he figured he was better off without them.

 

Why would anyone care about his sexuality anyway?

 

No one that mattered for sure, and that was all that Stiles cared about.

 

And then he was notified of Derek’s new video. He grinned widely because he had been waiting for this since Tuesday when Derek completely concealed any information of his new cover from Stiles.

 

The title read ‘ _Derek Hale – Slow It Down (Goo Goo Dolls cover)_ ’. The song was unknown to Stiles, a fact that made him even more curious.

 

The video wasn’t filled in Derek’s recording room, but _outside._ It started with a close up to Derek’s face.

_“Oh I want you now, so please don't let me down,_

_Oh just shut your mouth and know that you are everything to me._

_Can we just let go, of what we can't control?_

_And if the world should spin too fast,_

_I'll slow it down for you.”_

The music toned down a bit then and Derek’s voiced softened and the camera zoomed in his face.

“ _You know I loved a girl, who said that I could change the world_

_If only I was brave enough, to live the life in front of me_

_These memories are fading fast, they're scattered like a broken glass_

_Will they be mended, or as easily just swept away?_

_Oh my friend_ _this is not the end,_

_Just look around 'cause this is right where you and I belong.”_

 

Then the music went back to normal and he sang again the first verse. This time, the music built up some more before it abruptly stopped and came back on again at the line “ _Oh just shut your mouth and know that you are everything to me.”_

 

After that, the music eased back to soft tone as Derek’s voice eased its way between the notes.

_“Summer love and winter rain, you know they always fade away_

_But in the end you know, you and I will still remain.”_ __

 

Stiles realized that he was grinning on his screen when the video ended and the world refocused. Then he noticed the description box. “For him.” It read and then a few gaps before the subscribe links came on.

 

Stiles smiled so widely his cheeks hurt. He retrieved his phone and called Derek.

 

“I can’t believe you did that!” he exclaimed as soon as Derek answered.

 

Derek chuckled lightly. “ _I take it you like it_.”

 

“Liked it? Oh, no, sir. I didn’t like it, I fucking _loved_ it.” Stiles responded excitedly.

 

 _“Glad you did.”_ Derek said and Stiles could hear his beaming smile.

 

“Oh my god, and the description? You are so cute.”

 

Derek mocked a growl. “ _I am not_ cute _!_ ”

 

Stiles laughed playfully. “No, you are right, you are not cute, you are _adorable._ ” Derek pretended to be angry at him then but Stiles knew he was blushing and it made his heart flutter and his laugh to turn delighted. “God, I love you.” He said absently, not even giving a second thought to the sheer _right_ feeling that washed through him.

 

But then his laugh died down when he realized that Derek wasn’t saying anything. It made him sober up immediately. “Oh. I- I mean…” he started but he couldn’t find the right words to explain anything.

 

Derek cleared his throat then. _“Did you mean it?”_

Stiles bit his lip nervously. “Yes.” He decided hesitantly.

 

“ _Good. Because I love you too_.” Derek said and Stiles’s smile came back.

 

“Oh my God, you asshole! I thought I messed up, why would you let me believe that?”

 

“ _I wanted to be sure you meant it as much as I did before I returned the words_.” Derek responded and Stiles’s heart skipped a few beats.

 

“Say it again.” Stiles demanded.

 

“ _I love you, Stiles_.” Derek said without hesitation.

 

Stiles smiled and looked down at his crossed legs. “I love you too, Derek.”

**Author's Note:**

>  [Tumblr](http://game-cake.tumblr.com/)
> 
>  
> 
> [Playlist of songs used (and mentioned)](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2LnPMqkBYhuBClLikJZa1ZCBRjgLR0or)


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